The Sedalia Snack Squad Takes On: Israel
Well, here we are again, at another location around the world. This time, it's the Middle East!
This one looks like it could be good. I'm hopeful. We've had some hits and misses in the last few months. Let's stay on the positive side. Less Yackin, More Snackin!
Baked Garlic and Onion Puffs.
Behka: They look like Kix cereal. Oh, very garlicy. I like that! I can't get over how much they look like cereal. I bet if you put this in a bowl with milk it would probably not be good. Although maybe it would just dilute the flavor. You know how milk takes on the flavor of the cereal when you're done with the bowl? Would this make garlic milk? I can leave that one to the imagination.
Husbando: Garlic and onion Kix, yeah. These are really good. I could just plow through these. This is a good couch snack.
Behka: They're definitely crunchy. I get an onion smell. Those are nice. I don't know why they're the shape they are, though. They look different from the other kind, but they're the same brand. Does a different shape affect the way they taste? I don't think so. It must be a mental thing. Someone in marketing decided that, maybe.
Husbando: *Puzzled face* What is that smell? This is gonna sound really weird, but it smells like when you first open a brand new sealed board game. Like the cardboard and plastic and pieces. They taste like the rye crisps in Gardetto's. The little brown things. It's okay. It's not my favorite.
Behka: Very smokey smell. Oh, they're very sweet. Not like, candy sweet. Like sweet barbecue sweet. They're pretty nice, good and crunchy. I wonder if this is what they THINK American barbecue is, or if this is the way Israel barbecue is. Either way, someone's doing something right. I approve. Although they are tiny little bites.
Husbando: Oh, they're twisty curls. Ooooh! That kinda smells smokey barbecuey. Mmm. That is not American barbecue. That is a very Middle Eastern barbecue. I like that a lot. Despite the Liquid Smoke. I normally hate anything with Liquid Smoke in it, artificial smoke, you know?
Kremli Nougat Bites.
Behka: These smell like those peanut butter crackers you can buy in the snack aisle. You know, like the ones that are peanut butter and have peanut butter in the middle? Sometimes they have cheese... .product? I don't think they have a specific name, just snack crackers or whatever. They're very dry. I'm not hating on it, though. This would definitely dry out your mouth in a hot second, though. You need to have this with a glass of milk or something.
Husbando: My sniffer must be broken. It smells like a freshly painted room. *Confused look* It's an unusual consistency. It tastes like Reece's cereal.
Mahroum Handmade Baklawa.
Behka: This looks nice! Very buttery. Kinda nutty. It's definitely a mouthful. Oooh, it's a little spicy, too! That's not bad, though. This other piece reminds me of Shredded Wheat cereal. You know, the kind that are frosted? That's not bad. Of the two different pieces, I liked the "regular" one better.
Husbando: I think there are two different kinds in here. Mmmm. *Takes bite, crumbs go everywhere* Very cinnamon forward, that's very good. The other piece is better. So good.
Behka: I don't know how I feel about that. It's not... bad, but it's not good either. It kinda tastes like.... chili? It's like a chili snack in limbo. Not sure what it needs to be to shine, but has potential. I don't know if I've ever had Falafel. Does that need a capital letter? I know so little about the world. I'm just an uncultured American idiot.
Husbando: Falafel flavored puffs. It smells like chili powder. They're good. I'd eat em. I don't really know what else to say. Kinda salty.
Everything Chik Chak.
Behka: I don't really smell anything. This tastes like licking cardboard. This is... not what I want to eat. Not that I know what licking cardboard tastes like, I assure you. It's just kind of... nothing. In little spirals. They like their bites small in Israel. I guess I'm used to Big American Snacks. But, I will give them this, they have less air in their bags than we do, so you get more snack in your serving.
Husbando: Similar to the barbecue ones, but they don't smell as sweet. They smell like they have a good amount of flavor, but they taste just like plain wheat.
Strauss Popping Chocolate.
Behka: I kinda get a cherry taste? The chocolate is nice and smooth. The popping isn't as strong as it is in American Pop Rocks. I guess that's a good thing. I don't know if I'd want my teeth to be destroyed by Israeli chocolate. That's a phrase I've never said before, so I've got that going for me. The cow looks a little skinny, random thought.
Husbando: *Eats two pieces, opens mouth to let the sound out* It's popping! It's pretty good chocolate... with pop rocks in it.
Pesek Zman "Blondie" Chocolate Bar.
Behka: Ooh, flaky! Oh, that's nice. Caramel. I love caramel. This is a little crispy. It definitely takes over your mouth. Oh, this is good. I like this quite a bit.
Husbando: *Struggles with the packaging* It's two colored! Mmmmm! You know those like, chocolate vanilla strawberry wafer cookies? It tastes like that, dipped in chocolate. Now I'm getting the caramel.
Elite Egozi Bar.
Behka: It looks like a Twix, it tastes like.... Nutella. The caramel is very similar to, like a Milky Way. It's just... kind of unremarkable. It's... fine? It's like that guy that you kind of know from work, but you can't really say you know what he's like outside of the office. This doesn't have much personality, but it's pleasant enough.
Husbando: It's... a Snickers bar with hazelnuts! It's good, it just tastes just like that.
Pomegranate Turkish Delight.
Behka: It was okay. Very chewy. OH, there's something hard in it! It's an almond! That's a surprise. In these boxes, though, surprises can be a bad thing. In this case... eh. I got sugar everywhere! It's all over my shirt, even my keyboard. Thanks a lot, Israel.
Husbando: I don't think you'll like it. It tastes like Pomegranate jelly. And powdered sugar. But I grew up eating a ton of pomegranates, so it's familiar to me.
Mahroum Coconut Rolls.
Behka: That's just like taking a bite of... just coconut. Like a really kind of dry Mounds but without the chocolate. Why is it red on the outside, though? It's kind of confusing. I think of brown and white when I think of coconut. Although, I did learn the other day that green coconuts are a thing, and that you can get more water/milk out of them in a survival situation vs a brown coconut. Why I learned that, I don't know.
Husbando: See, it's so gross, you can't even open it. I just don't like artificial coconut. It's not as bad as it could be, because it tastes like it has real coconut. I don't hate it. I wouldn't purchase it, but I don't hate it.
Mini Pistachio Halva.
Behka: That doesn't smell good. What is going on here. This... tastes like chalk. Like slightly moist chalk. There's a pistachio on the wrapper, pistachios are good. This is not. This has betrayed the good name of the pistachio. The pistachio may never forgive you, Halva.
Husbando: *Makes face* That is a weird consistency and it tastes disgusting! It tastes like burned sesame seeds! *Gets a drink of water* That is TERRIBLE.
Behka: Overall, this was a MUCH better box than we've had in the last few months. My favorite was probably a tie between the Bissli barbecue and the Blondie chocolate bar. The worst thing was that Pistachio thing. The weirdest thing was the Chik Chik Everything. I've never really had a snack that didn't taste like anything before. Have I ever chosen a sweet as one of my favorites in these boxes? I don't think I have. I can't remember. It's a rare accomplishment, so be proud, candy.
Husbando: I think it was the most interesting box we've had in a while. Like, a lot of stuff was just... interesting. The worst thing Pistachio candy. The best thing was the Falafel or the Garlic Onion Puffs. The popping chocolate was the weirdest.
Well, there you have it, folks. You've take a small journey, touching the surface of what it means to snack in Israel. Join us in our next snack adventure next month!