Three Missouri Phrases I Didn’t Know Weren’t Everywhere

Now guys, admittedly, I live under a rock. I've acknowledge this.  The things I don't know that I probably should could fill an outdoor shed.  Or two sheds. 

And I'm open to learning!  So when I was talking with a friend the other day via text, I guess I said something that she'd never heard before.  Basically I was kind of annoyed with someone, and I wasn't too psyched about his decisions, and he wasn't super into admitting to or dealing with the consequences of said actions.

That sounds far, far, more serious than it is, you guys. I just wanted to be vague.  We're not talking about anything life changing here.  Anyway, I told her, "Well, tough tomatoes. He has to deal with it."

To which she said, "Um.... what? I'm laughing over here at your phrasing..."

Apparently this friend, who is admittedly a someone from West Virginia who lives in Idaho now (college friends, we both went to UCM), had never heard this phrase in her life. So it got me to thinking... well, jeez.  I thought everybody knew that one.  But apparently that one a few others are just Missouri/Midwestern usage only.

1.  "Tough Tomatoes."

Well, you can figure out the inference here.  It's basically something the church ladies used to say so that they didn't curse.  Like you'd say that instead of... well, you know.  Like they'd also say, "Cheese and rice!" or "Cheese and mice!" instead of saying that might take a name in vain.

2.  "He's got the holler tail!"

Now this one might not be as well known, but I swear I've heard it around here before.  Basically it means that someone's in a bad mood, but we don't know the reason. I know my Grandpa used to say it, and it was something to do with cows? About how they weren't feeling well because their tails were hollow... which is said as holler?

3.  "That makes as much sense as government cheese."

I KNOW YOU KNOW THIS ONE. I know that everyone's Dad or Uncle or Cousin Jeannie said this one. And it's pretty easy to figure out. Government cheese is something that is... not pleasant. Or at least it wasn't, back in the day.  Back in the olden days if you were struggling, part of the help you'd get would be a huge block of mystery cheese that you'd cut for sammitches.  While it wasn't inedible...it wasn't tasty. And nobody has time for that in their grilled cheese.  It doesn't make sense!

So what are some other phrases you've heard around that you think are just Missourian? Or just midwestern?  Share a few and we'll see just how common they are!

Tomatingly yours,
Behka